school decisions (part 1)

My husband and I attended the Kindergarten round-up at the nearby Catholic elementary school a few weeks ago. The first thing my husband said when it was over was, "We're sending Catherine to Kindergarten."

My husband was homeschooled and during our engagement he told me that it was important to him that I was open to the idea of homeschooling our children. I talked to his mother about homeschooling and she gave me "Catholic Homeschooling" by Mary Kay Clark to read. I met other homeschooling families. I was impressed by how well-behaved and mature their children were. This was one of the things that made Adam stand out to me, as well.

As I continued to read and think about homeschooling while our children were very young, I came across an article by Danielle Bean that made me laugh out loud. At the bottom of the article I saw www.daniellebean.com and went to type it in my browser, opening another world of homeschooling families in the blogosphere. I love what I've read. I love what I see. I wish it were what God was calling me to, but He's not...at least not right now.

We have a good, affordable Catholic school nearby. We have a superintendent, Father T., who understands: "You are the primary educators of your children. We are here to help." This is where the decision comes in. Do I need help? Yes - of course I need help. First and foremost, I need the help that comes from God through the sacraments, whether I homeschool or not. I need the help of my husband in raising and forming our children. Do I need the help of our Catholic schools in educating them? This is where the answer sounds like "yes".

As I read and learned about homeschooling, I came to see it as the "best" way to educate our kids. Sending them to a good Catholic school would be our second choice, public schools would be our last option. Then, of the various homeschooling options, I began to try and figure out which was the "best": Montessori, Charlotte Mason, Classical, Traditional? Better yet, I could pick the best elements of each method and design my own curriculum - tailored to meet each of my child's needs. That is the essence of homeschooling, after all.

Hmmm...where have I seen this before? Oh yes, in college I decided that being a nun or sister was the "best" vocation followed by consecrated lay person, then wife and mother. I started out locally, with the orders present in our diocese. I chose "the best": a young, vibrant teaching order, and began to discern my vocation with them. I am thankful for that period of quiet reflection with a wonderful order of Sisters and for an excellent spiritual director. He helped me to see that only part of a vocation involves an attraction to it. The other elements didn't fall into place then, as they are not falling into place now, in our homeschool.

This "vocation within a vocation" of homeschooling is not what God is asking of me. I am thankful for this year of homeschooling; I have learned a lot. As I continue to listen to the whisper of God (1 Kings 19), an image of the plans He has for us is starting to form in my mind...

"For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope." Jeremiah 29:11